American woman married to Bihari man shares her love for Indian culture, says 'it's not like movies'

What happens when a small-town American woman falls in love with a man from Bihar? For Jessica, it meant crossing oceans not only for marriage but also for a new way of life filled with challenges, laughter and cultural discovery.

Jessica first met her husband, Abhishek, through volunteer work in the US. A wrong number led to casual conversation, endless cups of chai, and eventuallu, a love story that turned into marriage. Afer their wedding, Jessica moved to Bihar where the couple now lives with their children. Over time, she learned fluent Hindi and started The Invisible India Podcast, where she shared her honest and often humorous experiences of adjusting to Indian life.

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American falls in love with Indian

Jessica's bond with India grew alongside with her relationship, where she admired the warmth of Indian family valives, hospitality, and the importance of community. At the same time she faced challenges with traditional gender expectations and adjusting to life with in-laws and extended family. “It’s not always like the movies,” she says, describing the reality of balancing freedom with social expectations.

Not just culture, but countries too

One of the Jessica's biggest lesson has been finding balance between her American upbringing and Abhishek's Indian traditions. While she grew up in a culture that valued independence, Abhishek was raised in an environment where family approval mattered deeply. Jessica never wanted blind obedience or rebellion in a partner but she wanted balance. Abhishek she says embodies this by respecting his parents while also standing firm for the life they are building together.

Cultures in conversation

Marriage for Jessica and Abhishek has meant constant learning from each other. She learned to embrace Indian family dynamics, while he adapted to her American side, where casual conversations and equal relationships with in-laws were new. Together, they found a middle ground—Jessica introduced Indian traditions to her American relatives, and Abhishek grew comfortable with the openness of her culture.

Jessica believes cultural differences are often misunderstood. People imagine rigid traditions in India or excessive freedom in the US, but she says relationships are not about stereotypes. “Whether in America or India, love is about choosing each other, every single day.”