Highlights:
- Fans wrongly assumed “Ruin the Friendship” was about Blake Lively amid her legal drama.
- The song instead reflects on Swift’s high school memories and a tragic loss.
- Recorded during her 2024 European Eras Tour, it captures nostalgia and regret.
- Swift references her real-life friend Abigail Anderson Berard, also mentioned in “Fifteen.”
The emotional closing line urges listeners to take chances before it’s too late.When Taylor Swift released the tracklist for her latest album The Life of a Showgirl, fans quickly noticed a song titled Ruin the Friendship. Many speculated it was about her rumored falling-out with longtime friend Blake Lively, especially amid Lively's public legal battle with It Ends With US director Justin Baldoni. Swift was reportedly dragged into that controversy, sparking talk of a rift between the two. However, neither has addressed the rumors.
Now, those fan theories can officially be put to rest. The song isn't about Lively at all. Instead, it's one of the most personal and heartbreaking tracks on the album, a reflection on a high school friendship that ended in tragedy.
Swift who recorded Showgirl during her 2024 European Eras Tour, opens Ruin the Friendship by recalling tender teenage memories at Nashville's Gallantin Road, watching football games from a friend's jeep and moments from prom. The chorus captures her youthful hesitation: “And it was not an invitation / Should’ve kissed you anyway.”
She confesses that she avoided turning the friendship into something more out of fear of ruining it. The lines go like, “Don’t make it awkward in second period,” she sings. “Might piss your ex off / Lately we’ve been good / Staying friends is safe / Doesn’t mean you should.”
But when the song takes a devastating turn in the last verse, in a hushed voice, Swift sings, “When I left school I lost track of you / Abigail called me with the bad news / Goodbye... / And we’ll never know why.” The lyric references Abigail Anderson Berard, Swift’s real-life best friend since high school, also mentioned in her 2008 hit “Fifteen.”
While Swift doesn't name the person who passed away, the emotional weight of the song in undeniable. She revisits the chorus with a haunting twist, “It was not an invitation / But I flew home anyway / With so much left to say.” In the closing lines, she whispers at the gravesite, “It was not convenient, no / But I whispered at the grave / ‘Should’ve kissed you anyway.’”
The song ends with a life lesson — one that feels deeply personal yet universally relatable. Swift sings, “My advice is always ruin the friendship / Better that than regret it / For all time.”
